what we're reading | Radical

Radical is an absolutely great book! It totally woke me up and challenged me to rethink why I did things. This is a book that challenges Christians to be disciples of Jesus, not just people who want to be part of a cultural club. When I first read this book, It changed my life in so many positive ways. God definitely used it to wake me to my laziness and my desire for a comfortable christian life.

The only negative thing I see in this book, is that it has the potential to make someone (like me) feel as though Christianity calls for a holy lifestyle that means radical abandonment of everything not "Christian".

Before I knew it, I quit television, gaming, movies, Facebook, laughing, etc. anything that I thought was part of culture and not part of God's culture.

I wanted to be set apart. But in doing so, I put myself in a position where I could no longer relate to world around me, even the Christian world; I was pretty much a monk for a few months. But I was failing at giving up my life to God in these areas. And I was failing at being able to connect to the lost through a relatable lifestyle. 

Through those mistakes though, God brought me around and I began to learn the balance. I'm learning how to live out the gospel as it is in the Bible, while still connecting with people in genuine ways and living & participating in our world and culture. 

With that being said, this is still one of the best, and most inspiring, challenging books both Jess and I have ever read. It caused us to rethink our motives and purposes in life. It reminded us that the words and life of Jesus often don't line up with the "American dream" or the comfortable, easy version of Christianity that we tend to fall into sometimes. If you want a deeper relationship with Jesus, this is an amazing book to read. 

--René

Preparing for your marriage... not just your wedding.

This past weekend we were invited to share a little bit of our story as a married couple at "Save the Date" (LCBC's class for engaged/dating couples).

We talked about how we met and got engaged. Our first year of marriage. Trusting God through the difficulties we experienced that year. And our move to PA. It was a really neat opportunity. And it was something that I wish we had when we were engaged.

The night posed some interesting questions in my mind. The biggest one...

If I had prepared as much for our marriage as I did for our wedding, how would that had changed things? 

Now, before I go on... I love my husband and I love our marriage. I would not change a thing about our life and experiences together (including our wedding). However, we have also learned a lot of things the hard way. We had some tough conversations after we got married that would have been a lot better to have before we got married. I think we both realize now that, had we taken more time to focus on the being married rather than the getting married, our marriage would have been even better from the start than it was.

So, to you dating & engaged ones... how about you? Are you taking the time to prepare for your marriage? or just your wedding?

It's so easy to get caught up in all the planning and the pretty that we can forget to do the work necessary to have a solid foundation in our relationship with our husband/wife. Or maybe we don't know how to prepare for our marriages.

We're no experts now (just one year-ish later), but here's some ways that have helped us invest in our relationship and that we wish we'd applied more purposefully back in the day...

Find mentors. Find a couple whose marriage you admire and respect, and spend time with them. Lots. Let them rub off on you. Let them show you what a healthy, thriving relationship looks like. Find newlyweds and couples celebrating their ten, twenty, thirty-year anniversaries. Talk to them and get advice on how to handle life together any stage.

Talk to each other. Talk about the tough stuff and the silly stuff. About how you'll manage your finances and who will do the dishes and take out the trash. About what kind of pets you want and how many kids you want and where you want to live and work. Know those things going into it.

And most importantly... pray. Pray for your marriage. Pray for each other. Pray together and individually. When you're both on the same path, seeking Jesus, communication becomes way easier and way more meaningful. You're able to be more patient, more loving, and more understanding with one another. It makes an incredible difference.

If you're engaged or married... what did you do before getting married or what do you do now to prepare for/invest in your marriage?

xo,

Jess

Happy Birthday Mom!

I love my mom. She's where I get my fondness for tea and tendency towards sarcastic humor. She introduced me to Star Treck and Star wars & legos and model airplanes and sports. And she loved me anyway when I played with Barbies instead. Most importantly, she raised me to love Jesus and to love people. She still shows us how to do both.

Happy Birthday Mommy. We love you!

Here are a couple flashbacks for you all…

 

On fitting in and why my hair's pink

I spontaneously went a little hair-dye-happy this weekend and this was the end result. What say you? Can I pull off the pink? But anyway... more on that in a moment. 

First, I want to share with you about something that Rene and I have been talking about a lot recently. See, coming from about as far west as you can go to about as far east as you can go on one continent, we've experienced some changes. I would call it a culture shock. 

California is a place full of variety and individuality. Sure, you have your conservatives and your business people... but you also have that man in Santa Cruz who spends his days promenading the streets in a pink tutu and parasol. And then there's a million and a half sorts in between. If you're from CA, or any of the west coast states for that matter, I'm sure you know what I mean. 

Not to say that Pennsylvania doesn't have it's variety of people. It does. But it's such a different type of variety and such a different range of lifestyles than what we've always known. 

I've always felt like a piece of the personality puzzle that made life so interesting, nestled perfectly into my proper little place. California just fit. 

And we've yet to find our fit here in Pennsylvania. There are so many aspects of our lifestyles that are foreign here. Part of it has to do with allowing ourselves the time it takes to get settled and find our place. But I think there's another part to it. Because Lancaster, PA is not California. It is very, VERY different. And we will not just fit in with the majority naturally. It takes a little more work. 

So with all of that rambling... what does staying true to ourselves look like in a place that's so foreign in so many ways? 

Both of our reactions seem to lean towards not conforming to the different culture here. In fact, I think we sort of did the opposite. Hence the pink hair...

So there are my thoughts for you. And here's my pink ombre hair.

How would you remain yourself in a place and culture so different?

xo, 

Jess

But also do.

It’s really easy to say and say a lot. That one phrase that pops up when you don’t know what else to say and the conversation gets real.

“I’ll be praying for you.”

And we pray for them. And then that’s all.

Someone tells us you about a rough patch in their life and sometimes that’s the default response… prayer. And it absolutely should be. I’m not questioning the need for or effectiveness of prayer. We should bring our issues and the issues of others before God and ask Him to act. But then what?

I think that so often, we can pray for God to do something all day long and still be entirely oblivious to the fact that we might be the way he wants to do it.

“If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking daily food, and you say to them ‘Go in peace, be warmed and filled,’ without giving them the things the need for the body, what good is that?” 

James 2:15-16

What good is it if we pray for God to do the very thing that we are capable of doing but still don’t do? 

…If we pray that God would provide for someone struggling financially, but don’t help them ourselves? If we pray that God would free someone from loneliness and depression, but don’t take the time to befriend and encourage them? If we pray that God would show His love to someone, but we never love them? What good is that?

Pray, yes. But also do.

xo,

Jess

In the Meantime

"In the Meantime" is a song Rene wrote with his friend and coworker Michael Ferrari for LCBC and I'm really excited that I get to share it with you guys today. I'm a proud wife.

Below are the lyrics. We'd love to hear your thoughts.

In the morning 
In the evening 
In my doubting 
In my believing

In my winning 
In my losing 
I'm still choosing 
To believe in mean time  

Where I wander 
Wherever I roam 
Wherever you are 
Is where I'll make my home in the meantime  

Keep these eyes up 
Keep this head straight 
Life is like a game of hurry up and wait 
There's nothing I can do 
Except believe in you 
I don't know how you do it 
But you always pull me through  

In my waiting 
In my leaving 
In my asking 
In my receiving

Though I wonder 
What you're doing 
I'm still choosing 
To believe in the meantime  

Whatever eyes see 
Whatever hands can hold 
I'm trying to believe 
You see and hold my soul in the meantime

hello Baltimore

Also on Easter weekend, we went to Baltimore. Specifically, the Inner Harbor. Home to the Baltimore aquarium. Dragon-shaped paddle boats. The coolest Barne's and Noble store in the world. And about a bazillion tourists.  

 

 

We had an amazing dinner at this Italian place called Brio just across from the harbor. I'm pretty sure that the raspberry cheesecake we had for desert is one of the top ten things I've ever tasted.

A Surprise

Some of our good friends from California told us they'd be sending us a gift for Easter and that we should be home Saturday morning to sign for the package. 

Well, the "package" that was going to be "delivered" turned out to be them. At our front door. In Pennsylvania. 

THEY FLEW ACROSS THE COUNTRY AND SURPRISED US. 

For the weekend. 

They are Crazy. And the only one's we know who could pull of a scheme like this. 

Here's a little preview of our reaction Saturday morning...

...We may have been a tad surprised. Just a little.This was the first time we've had friends/family from CA here in Lancaster. And it was wonderful. A weekend full of great conversation, laughs, and hugs. They even got to come to a few of the Easter gatherings at LCBC and see Rene play. 

Hernandez family... no matter how well or long we've known you, your generosity, spontaneity, and genuine love for others still never ceases to surprise us. Thank you for the best possible Easter we could have had here in PA. We love you guys.