missing the sea

via

Disney's The Little Mermaid was released the same year I was born and is the first movie I ever remember seeing. When I was about six years old, I genuinely considered swimming into the bay and becoming a mermaid but opted out because I didn't want to leave my family. Part of me still wants to believe that's actually possible.

I grew up just down the street from the sea. It's always been a part of my life as long as I can remember.

Have you ever had a place that, every time you are there, just leaves you in awe of God's beauty... That leaves you standing star struck by the vast, amazing work of art before you... That place for me has always been the ocean. I've never lived farther than fifteen minutes away from it and now that I no longer do, I realize how much I took that for granted.

But to be honest, missing the sea has made me realize how closed minded I have so often been to beauty of another sort. The same God who created the majestic coast of California also created the ever changing hills that surround me now. He created waves and sandy shores, but He also created trees and sunsets and seasons. All of which didn't have to look pretty in order to be practical, but are. God has created a beautiful world for our enjoyment and His glory. So who am I to say that any single stroke of this painting we call home is of lesser beauty and value than another?

I still miss the ocean as much as ever. But I am learning to stand in awe of golden light shining through intertwined branches. of snow that blankets hills in pristine white. of bricks and rooftops laid three hundred years ago still standing. I am learning to find beauty in the everyday things that are not yet familiar to me. And I am learning to see God's workmanship where I never thought to look for it before.

Back to home from home

We spent this last weekend back in Monterey, CA for my first wedding of many to come between now and next fall. (I took the photo above during a little break in the reception... I fell in love all over again with those city lights along the bay under cloudy skies).

How strange it was to fly info SFO and try not to let it feel like arriving home after a long trip. Like Lancaster and LCBC and our beautiful old city and little kitty had all been a pleasant but lonely dream. I'e flown into that airport so many times. And every time, whether warm and welcoming or a little sad, it's meant coming home. always. Until now... Now we were just visiting and the word home is supposed to mean a cold place thousands of miles away that none of those dearest to me know much of.

And it was hard at first, to wake myself up to that. I think if I could have helped it I would have waited a bit longer before going back. Waited until Lancaster started to feel more like home. That takes time and we just haven't had much yet.

We had a wonderful time in CA. Seeing our families was so refreshing. And there were a couple friends I was seriously considering kidnapping and bringing back to PA with us. But all of it got me thinking about what "home" is supposed to mean. It's such a big, deep word for being so commonly used. It's never meant just your house, the place you live. It's where you keep what you love. Where Rene is and where my family and friends are. Where we're inspired and creative and challenged to live our best. That's been California for so much of our lives. That's a scary thing to change.

But relationships and life are what make home "home" after all. Those are things I think we tie to places when they probably shouldn't be. No matter where we are, our God is the same. He is the same God in Lancaster, PA as He is in Monterey, CA. He is faithful and loving and strong. None of those things have changed or ever will change with our location. He is the ultimate source of life and the ultimate relationship. And He is here. So... we are home. wherever that may be on a map.

A merry little Christmas

This Christmas was a beautiful and bittersweet one. It will probably be our last time to see all our family and friends together for a long while and we are going to miss them so much. But we had an amazing Christmas eve and day with some of our favorite people. I'm also especially proud of how our tree turned out this year... bright, colorful, snow covered, and filled with collected ornaments and memories. 

We used my Grandma's Nativity set this year. It looked so beautiful in front of the tree... I wish she could have seen it.

Leading up to Christmas this year, I read through the story of Jesus' birth in Luke. It tells of how the shepherds saw the angels, went to find the baby Jesus, and ran off to tell all the world about it. Which makes sense. You'd probably freak out too if you had hosts of angels announce the birth of the Messiah to you while on your night shift. It's the next part that really stood out to me though this year. In Chapter 2 verse 19 it says...

"But Mary treasured up all these things in her heart and thought of them often."

She took all of it in... her new baby boy, the miracle of His birth, the angels, the gifts, the people traveling to come see Him and worship Him. She let it sink in and then she held those things in her heart and treasured them.

I can't even begin to imagine all that Mary must have felt that night, but I do know what it is to experience blessings. I know the love of family. The joy of friendships you'll have for life. Most importantly though, I know and treasure the very same thing that Mary did... her Savior. Above all else is the treasure of knowing Christ.

And as we move on from the lights and the presents and back on to the packing and boxes, these are the things I'll treasure up in my heart and think of often.

I hope that this Christmas, you experienced the love of family, the joy of friendship, and the ultimate treasure and meaning of it all in knowing Jesus Christ. How will you remember it?

Merry Christmas!

Love,

Rene & Jess